As of tonight grandpa has spent one full day at his new home. How was it? Well simi-okay I guess. Last night I just knew the nursing home people were going to call and tell us that he had left....thankfully this did not happen. He instead told my mother today he was up all night, and not one person checked in on him. This was one thing I told him they would do....so that he would not lose his oxygen and worry like he had been doing at home. He claims they never came not once and that was not right. Well of course you have to remember he still "dislikes" this place, so will only say or see the things he wants. Reality of the matter was that he acutally slept most of the night (the nurses do a bed check every 2 hours for each person). Each check he was asleep on his couch, that was wonderful news. I who have been staying with him since Tuesday night had been up with him from 12-4 am everynight.
Later mom and I both went up to see him and grandma. Well just as I thought he would be, he was very angry with me. He would not even say hi hardly. Then when I tried to explain something to him about hospicis (as the lady was there trying to set it up with him)....he yelled "you stop I have hear enough from you...." I then asked mother to try and explain it to him. She said the exact same thing I did and he was fine with it. I knew it wouldn't be easy being the person who asked him to move in, drove hem there, and then left him. However, I did hope he could at least speak to me. I am praying like crazy by the time I come back on Friday (Chris and I orignally had planned to come for Easter, I just got an extra little trip!) he will speak to me. It wouldn't have been normal though for him to have gone in and not been some what mad.
I do think though he does like being close to grandma again. It has been a year now since they had been seperated. I also believe if he will join in on some of the activities he will enjoy the social part of this. He currently has been at home with just one lady watching him....and he loves to talk. As mom and I left tonight he did lean over to mom and say....you know sitting out here in the main room there are a few people to gossip with. Mom said yes daddy, try and make some friends it isn't that bad here. I hope tonight he does well. Tomorrow I plan on taking a few more of his personal homie type items up there before I head home. Maybe that will help ease the anger he is still holding inside at me.
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I really doubt that your grandfather is mad at you, he is just mad at the situation... you know having declining health, needing help living the day-to-day, your grandmother's health issues, etc. You didn't create this situation, you just had to step up and point it all out to him. I predict that he will decide it isn't so bad at the nursing home and that he really enjoys having some company from the other residents. What you did was tough, but brave, so you shouldn't feel bad about it.
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